I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
We have so much sex to catch up on
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Randomize
