dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
My feet surprised me
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
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