can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
