That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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