Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
