She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Randomize
