So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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