Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize
