apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
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