Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I need water and some morals
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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