My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
