I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
