I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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