Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Randomize
