it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Randomize
