why didn't you poke me back
She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
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