Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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