I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
