she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
