i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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