I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Randomize
