Grow some girl-balls and come out already
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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