Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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