I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Randomize
