I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize