We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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