i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Randomize
