Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
