the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
