Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Randomize
