How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
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