Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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