If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
