What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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