Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Randomize
