Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
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