just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Randomize
