how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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