Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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