Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
