Will you blow on my dice?
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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