3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
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