the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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