I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
