She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
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