Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
My feet surprised me
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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