do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
