either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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