Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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