how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
I just blew my weed a kiss
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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