I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
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